Weather

A wise man once said that you can not let the weather control your circumstances - so sometimes you must paint in the rain. Well, I am trying to convince myself that this doesn't apply to me! As most of you know, Max and I came to Wyoming from a sunny Oklahoma. We have seen 2 snowstorms in the month of May and because our little systems were use to the mild humid weather we left, we have gotten everything under the sun since the transition. I have had pink eye twice now, and Max has a nasty case of what Odessa has called croup. I couldn't really paint in the rain if I wanted to. But to see the positives, I have been able to read more often than I have in the past. I have started 3 books.

One book is a compilation of treasured letters written to loved ones during a separation. A good one for me to start off with, huh? It hasn't caused puddles of tears, just a way of seeing someone else put my feelings into words and a supreme gratitude that I have Brig for a lot longer than I can even fathom. The physical separation can be hard, but we are able to communicate on the phone every so often and via emails. I can only say, the Lord knows what his is doing (we kind of got use to these forms with our long distance dating relationship.) And needless to say, we miss Brig dearly but are doing quite well and are more than blessed.

Little Max, who isn't quite so little, keeps me going. In the last little while, I have begun to see a glimpse of this precious child's personality. He is very active - I have to change his 'environment' often since he can not change it himself. He can only be in the swing for 20 minutes, watch the lights of this piano toy thing for 15 minutes, and be in the bath for 10 minutes before he needs something else. (Throughout this post, I have held him, put him on the floor, turned on the piano toy, and picked him up again.) He loves to be held although he never quite relaxes. He can sense when someone is not happy by a loud voice or a dissatisfied face. On Mother's Day, I was making the comment to my brother-in-law that I was not part of the 'mothers' this year because my child did not even know I was his mother. I still felt like my mom's little girl who needed to celebrate her and not quite ready to join the ranks of the best title of 'Mother' myself, trying to push off that huge responsibility until next year. Well, Max has proven me wrong! In the morning, when I am finally awake, and Max (who somehow magically gets from his crib to my bed at some point in the night) looks up at me and sees that I have finally come to, grins from ear to ear and I can tell for that brief half-second, that he knows I am his mom. (And I am sure he is thinking, "I slept well, didn't you sleepy-head?" I smile back and our day starts. He smiles when he hears my voice and makes eye contact with me if someone else is holding him. I am in two worlds with him - wanting to see him do more, like even reach for the little stuffed pig I put in front of his face, and wanting to hold that 8 pound scrawny little Muffin again! In Brig's mind, he still is skinny and scrawny... I suppose this idea of wanting to see what lies ahead and having the past will always be what you want as a mother. I already know that they grow up too fast, and he is only 3 months old! I love being a mother and am even more grateful for my wonderful mother who is still raising us...

Besides reading, we have watched my little brother, Corde team rope at a rodeo, and some of my little sister's soccer games (Julionna). I have enjoyed being with 3 of my sisters again. We have definitely caught up on lots of gossip and reminisced about the growin'-up days. (We can make fun of each other and laugh til we cry.) Just yesterday, I was kinda grumpy and so was my sister, Josie, so we decided to be grumpy together! We went to the rec center to work out and wanted Ice Cream Land afterward! Great combo... She brought us Italian Creme' Sodas today on her lunch break. Odie and I had a chance to visit when amazingly both of our kids were asleep at the same time... we talked about in-laws. Hers a bit more in-law like than mine! I was thinking about how lucky I am and that I actually enjoy my in-laws. I have visited with Morgs, Chels, and Steph on the phone this week! Corny I know, but I love my sisters. They really are the best friends that know you so well and still LIKE you! I never thought I would think of having more - but I am kinda excited thinking about Corde getting married and giving me another one! OH DEAR!

Well, Max is bored (and if you are still reading, I am sure you are too) and I need to eat something. Now that I have waited until this point, I will have to munch on something quick with him hanging over my arm! Is my child abnormally spoiled, or do other moms want to admit to it too?